Friday, September 21, 2007

Mental Struggle

What a horrible run this morning. Ugh. My legs felt like cinder blocks and my stomach was upset. Not good. Never, ever, ever will I eat Mexican food and drink a maragarita (or two) the night before a long ever, ever again as long as I live. And I really didn't eat that much but it was enough to make me feel like crap. Oh and the fact it was just an overall crappy run. But it's done. I went out slow, I came back slow but I finished.

I am starting to hate the taper but have realized one thing which makes me appreciate it a bit more. This is not just a time to let my body heal as much as it is time to continue the mental training. These short runs are seeming more difficult than any of my long runs (with maybe the exception of that one 17 miler I did and I thought I was going to die) physically and mentally. Today was a mental fight and test. I didn't want to be out there, I kept thinking "f***, I'm only at ___ mile" So I had to practice pushing those negative thoughts out and remind myself there are going to be times during the marathon my body is not going to want to continue but I KNOW I can do it. I proved that I could get over my mental hurdle this morning. I wanted to give up, start walking, and find a phone to call home collect for someone to pick me up but I didn't. I convinced myself I wanted to finish and I had to get to the next spot and it worked. I'm not saying the negative thoughts weren't there. They were and I allowed them to pop in once in awhile to say their piece but then I learned to send them back so I could keep going.

5 comments:

Nancy said...

Great mental work!! I did a post once about bringing along a club and beating down every ugly or difficult thought that cropped up. Feel free to borrow my club and get it out whenever you need it! :D

Bill Carter said...

Jamie

I frickin' hate the taper. Your body does this complete freak out thing and it sucks....but you've got to do it. I started cracking up when I read about the mexican. I love mexican food and will eat it tonite despite the fact that I have a 20 miler tomorrow morn with hills. I just know I'm going to pay.
Good job knocking down those negative thoughts. That is what we runners have to do.
Bill

Marcy said...

OMG that reminds me of the one time I ate a whole bunch of jalepeno peppers right before a run. OMG it was horrible, horrible, horrible. Never again LOL

Awesome job chica!! You rock!!

RunToTheFinish said...

I totally agree, taper in the past was the hardest part for me, suddenly every run felt tough. I think it was because mentally I wasn't doing as much...but you know what, you've got this in the bag.

Oh and yeah, the mexican before a long run..also about the same as a big greasy cheeseburger, so you might skip that too..not that I've um totally done this...multiple times.

Andria said...

Ugh! Crappy runs are soooo crappy! But, it sounds like you really got a good handle on the mental part. That is a huge breakthrough and so it's a bit less crappy. Glad you made it through without placing the collect call. You're doing great!